For Today

here it is 9:05pm, Taps was just played, and I am thinking about my life. I sometimes wonder if this is it...all my life is...don't get me wrong- I love my life, well most of the time I love my life. I've got 3 healthy growing boys, I have an angel. I am a proud wife of a Sailor and I am happy to say we've been married for almost 11 years now, we've lived all over the United States. I've got a lot to be thankful for and I am very thankful, even grateful for the life I've been given.

I am bored out of mind tonight, which is weird seeing as how there are a million things in the house I could be doing...putting away the loads upon loads of laundry, mopping the floor (for the third time this week), washing dishes, dealing with paperwork, working on the extra room to get it turned into Samuel's bedroom, taking the craft stuff out of that room and putting it in my room, and a million other projects that need to be worked on, but here I am sitting outside on the back porch listening to the silence and enjoying the 90 temperature outside. It's very calming and relaxing, even very peaceful...I LOVE IT!! It's a great way to end a day that has been going going going.

We went to story time at the library here on base for the first time...it was well lets just say interesting...lots of kids, lots of talking, just lots of everything. Than after that I had a doctors appt for some pain I've been having where my c-section scar is. Bad news it looks like I'm going to end up in surgery...for either a hernia, adhesions from the scar, or another c-section...yep you heard that last little part right..c-section. However the doctor hasn't called me so I am guessing the pregnancy test came back negative...or so I hope...or do I...part of me hopes it's negative I mean afterall I did get my tubes tied, however there is a part of me that would be happy. but my goodness have you met my boys...they drive me up the wall how in the world could I ever handle another one...oy gets my head spinning just thinking about it. Whats funny about that possibility is that Rob and I were just discussing this all last night about how now is about the time I normally get pregnant again...you know when the youngest is between 18 and 20 months (Caleb is 19 months old now). I think it's because thats the point where it dawns on me that they are no longer babies. what brought it up last night was I was holding Caleb and he was throwing a temper tantrum about something and it just dawned on me...he's not a bitty baby anymore...he's a toddler, growing up way to fast on me..like they all do. I've tried to hold him back a little, I think all that has done is made him more and more comfortable sleeping in my bed, nursing longer, and getting babied longer by his brothers (oh okay and me)! He gives his brothers this little pouty look and they GIVE in to him every single time...jeez yes it works on me also! He's spoiled...if baby's can be spoiled. so thats how the whole conversation came up yesterday anyway...Caleb throwing a temper tantrum. so here's my thinking...we are working hard at paying off bills (well kinda stalled for a bit till Rob's pay is fixed again) and saving money (to pay cash for the next vehicles and to buy a house in Virginia [hopefully]) well than I would like to maybe consider adoption again. There are so many children out there that need good families...even crazy families like us! hmmm something to ponder about...guess only time will tell! so there's my ranting for the evening....

thankful for...blessed because of...
my computer...so I can write whats onmy mind. keep in touch with friends and family faster...share pictures on...find coupons....do research...spend more money on...play games on...watch shuttle launches from...